The Truth About Settling In Relationships...
When you “settle” you accept something that is below your standard, lessening the importance of your standard.
I have a vendetta against settling and my closest loved ones will be able to tell you all about it. There is something so powerful about saying “No, I will wait for something I am going to be completely happy with”. By not settling, you are fully in control of your happiness.
Sometimes there are good reasons that we settle. It may be to avoid an argument, because you love someone and hold their happiness as a priority, or maybe it is a financial reason. I have experienced all three and, in my opinion, I do not like to make a habit out of this. When you “settle” you accept something that is below your standard, lessening the importance of your standard.
It means that they wanted something better but figured you were alright for them at this moment.
This is extremely important in life, but most importantly in relationships. How would you feel if someone said that they “settled” for you in a relationship? It definitely has a negative connotation, right? It means that they wanted something better but figured you were alright for them at this moment. It says more about them than it does about you, but let me explain what dynamic that creates. It breeds an environment of resentment, disappointment, and a constant search for more. They may be happy with you in the moment but are they completely satisfied? Your partner will always want more from you trying to prove to themselves that you were worth “settling” for.
You will know your partner is what you need when you hold your standard where it is and they rise up to meet it.
Ladies and Gentlemen: this is NOT what our world has come to. There are 7.5 Billion people in this world and by settling you are not doing yourselves any favors. Find someone who you love, who you couldn’t live without, and who you know meets/exceeds your standards. Don’t lower your standards or allow someone else to make you feel like they lowered their standards for you. You can do this by knowing your worth. You will know your partner is what you need when you hold your standard where it is and they rise up to meet it.
If they can standardize a price of a burger, you can standardize how you will be treated and what you deserve in a relationship.
When you go to a restaurant and look at the menu, a burger may cost $4.75. If you ask to make some adjustments by omitting the tomato and onion, they are still going to charge you $4.75. The restaurant has a certain price that they have standardized which won’t be depleted based on what someone else has chosen to omit. If they can standardize a price of a burger, you can standardize how you will be treated and what you deserve in a relationship.
The moral of the story is, figure out what you want and then lock it in place. Allow yourself and your loved ones to rise up to that standard. Constantly adjust as you see fit, but never lower your standards on account of something/someone else. When you do this, you settle. Life is too short for you to live a mediocre life.